=)

"and yes there are times when I hate you but I don't complaint,

Coz I've been afraid that you would walk away,
Oh but now I don't hate you,
I'm happy to say that
I WILL BE THERE AT THE END OF THE DAY"

Andai

Andai dapat ku hentikan waktu,
Dan putarkan ke masa lalu,
Akan ku lakukan,
Tapi ku tak mampu,
Di luar kudratku

Andai dapat ku hentikan tangisan,
Yang keluar semalaman,
Akan ku cuba,
Tak mampu ku lawan,
Sesak jantung menyiksakan

Andai dapat kau cari,
Di mana letaknya hati ini,
Akan kau lihat,
Dalam dirimu sendiri,
Dalam genggam jari-jemari

P/s : teruskanlah, teruskanlah.

Let's Talk About Professionalism.

The word professional does not adhere to a certain guidelines made by some crackpot fools. It depends on your surroundings. Say, if you were in war zone, wearing neckties and slacks are so out of place people might think you wanna die in style. Or making jokes in front of your customers is not a bad thing to do, if you're a clown. Yeah you get what I'm shitting bout here.

BUT, there are codes of communications which must be followed no matter who you are, as long as it is in your WORKING SPACE.

Respect. Making fun of your colleagues in front of your clients, so not professional. If you're a doctor, that's twice the sin. Jokes and respect should come hand in hand. If you are not able to do that, stop trying hard to make jokes in public. Its embarrassing and awkward, not only for you, but for the audience as well.

Dress code. Hey, Egyptian universities don't have specific dress codes. Not for classes, not for rounds. Even so, have you seen anyone wearing slippers to class? Yes you have. Yourself. Whoever you are, please stop wearing slippers to a formal educational institute. Its hard to take you seriously. I mean, seriously? Slippers and track bottoms to your medical classes? What were you thinking?

I have been taught that dressing up to the standard is not only for the myself, but also for the people around me. Stop making people feel awkward in your presence. That's the key.

Cleanliness. People, I know its winter now and the temperature is quite low in the mornings. PLEASE TAKE A BATH. OR STAY AWAY FROM PUBLIC PLACES. OR DIE. You are a pollution to the world. You stink and my nose bleeds when you pass by. Don't just bathe, please brush your teeth too. Nobody likes talking to a shithole. If you have medical problems like gingivitis or or diabetic ketoacidosis which make your breath stink as hell even after cleaning your mouth, do consult your doctor and meanwhile take every precaution to prevent bad breath. Oh yes, breakfast in the morning before you go out because if you don't, chances are that the rancid acidic smell from your stomach would escape through your mouth and people would call your "perut busuk". Not a pleasant thing.

p/s : labcoats are super cool and its so cool it makes you the most gorgeous guy in town. And its professional.

Summer in Malaysia

So, here I am. 3 days away from my flight to Egypt.

I am neither sad nor happy. Extremely indifferent to the situation.

Considering I would not be coming back here for about 2 years and 3 months, the fact that I would miss my bestie's wedding, and also my brother's wedding... I should feel something? But sadly, (or should i feel thankful that I'm not on a nervous breakdown or something?) I am emotionally drained. To me, the holiday ended a long time ago. The school break was still on, but my heart longed to be back in Egypt. Back to the simple life I led there.

I guess only a few people know what I'm really going through. The experience that I got this year changed me. In a good way. Somehow I feel a bit more prepared for whatever the future holds. I've learnt that life is short - learn to appreciate the ones who appreciate you.

I have also learned that seriously, doubly seriously, if you don't have substance - love, passion, honesty, kindness, respect - you ain't going nowhere.

And lastly, friendship is the only bond that lasts (excluding family ties. that's never gonna break too, no matter how you don't like it). I thank Allah for granting me friendships that lasts since they started. To those  friends which i chose to let go, I believed it was for the best. These let-go's were heartbreaking, but necessary. I think. I don't know, but do believe that breaking a friendship is better than creating an enemy. Part ways, and move on different paths. No harm done whatsoever to our futures.

In the short span of two and a half months here in KL, I have gotten myself into a mixture of situations. There were times I felt love so great it was overwhelming - I never thought I would feel that way again. But I did, and still do. Thank you for never giving up on me. There were times when I had conflicts all around, and nobody was there for me but my depressing blog. *peluk blog kuat-kuat*. And there were family issues here and there, as usual, but through it all, we became closer to one another. Alhamdulillah.

I consider myself extremely lucky.

so yeah, I would like to end this entry with a few things I put in my wishlist for the coming academic year.
1) start taking guitar lessons. like really learn to play. I have a guitar in Egypt but never plucked a tune with it.
2) I wanna get serious at getting back in shape. seriously. doubly serious.
3) be a better person.

(academic la sgt wishlist aku kan?)

Impian Seorang Narsis

Ada ketika dia bermimpi,
Untuk menjadi sempurna,
Dikagumi dan digilai ramai,
Setiap katanya bagai kanun,
Dipercayai penuh otomatis,

Dalam konteks dunia sosialis,

Rupa gaya dan harta yang terutama,
Hati dan budi kedua ketiga,
Mudah hidup sedemikian,
Segala rintangan ditempuh rupawan

Tenanglah Di Sana

Dunia ini tak sempurna bagimu,
Terlalu banyak cela,
Tidak memahami dirimu,
Pintamu yang tertinggi,
Kau impi yang terdalam,
Jasadmu di bumi,
Kudratmu sejauh musytari
Kau istimewa tersendiri

Pergilah, pergilah,
Tiada lagi buatmu di sini,
Tiada hutang yang perlu dijelas,
Tiada dendam yang perlu dibalas,
Tenanglah di sana,
Di dalam taman syurga,
Kelak ketemu bersama,
Tiada duka, hanya bahagia

Do you?

As we sit on the ground,
Wind caressing our faces,
The smell of rain in the air,
Damp soft grass pillow our seats,
Do you feel how I feel?

Pretty lights around the park,
Happy people laugh out loud,
A pretty plane flew above us,

Twinkling red and blue lights,
Do you see what I see?

My heart beating fast,
Breathing becomes uneven,
Blood vessels pulsating in my ears,
I hide these with a deep sigh,
Do you hear what I hear?

I see visions of us coming here again,
Hand in hand side by side,
Talking about the last visit,
Tickled by memories of the past,
Do you want what I want?