Biarlah

Andainya Takdir

Biarlah tiada pesan dan janji,

Biar tiada kau di sisi, 

Aku mengerti

Seterdaya semampuku kucoba menunggu,
Biarlah lompang hatiku ini,

Mengharap pulang kau yang pergi

Kembalilah kepada ku,

Tika punah mimpi mimpimu,
Kembalilah di saat perlu, 

Episod episod duka biar berlalu 

Biarlah waktu ini kau bebas berlari,

Jika tersasar hilang arahmu,
Pulang ke pangkal ku menunggu

Biar sementara ini tiada terisi kekosongan hati,

Diri ku air tenang mengalir tuju muara,

Andainya memang takdir berakhir ku redha

HI

Hi,

It has been a while. 

Nothing has changed. 

Still the same person.

With same feelings.

The same hope. 

Stagnant. 

Time stopped. 

Happy By Proxy

In the sincerest manner possible,

I pray for your happiness,

I hope that you have everything I don’t,

Be happy for me by proxy

Jauh Di Sudut Hati

 

Sayang, 

Ku bawa jauh rinduku,

Kerna aku telah tahu, 

Kau bukan milikku,

Sayang, 

Sesungguhnya bukan mudah,

Menjalani hidup ini, 

Tanpa kau di sisi

Jauh di sudut hati, 

Aku masih bermimpi,

Mimpi yang indah,

Esok kau kembali

Jauh disudut hati, 

Ada waktu-waktunya,

Aku berdoa,

Kau pulang semula

Sayang, 

Biarku mengingatimu, 

Biarku gantung harapan,

Hingga sampai waktu,

Nafas terakhirku

P/S : Rindu tidak tertanggung :'(

Sensory Memories

The body is a living camera,

It continuously takes snapshots of life,

Then at random moments it will send recaps to the brain,

Relive the past for a short while.

The gloomy morning today,

Brought in gusts of chilly wind brushing my skin,

Almost made me reflexively reach out to you,

As I used to before. 

I wish I could control the weather, 

Or at least turn off the recaps function of my body, 

It seems that everything is calling me back to you,

There has not been a day that I don’t miss you :(

Confabulations

The way our brain works, 

It would always try to protect its host,

Memories of the past would slowly fade, 

Or simply lose its actual meaning

Those memories which do not bring us peace 

   would be filtered with new narratives,

Faces of those whom we used to love

   would either fade or become less attractive,

Happy moments of the past 

   would be askewed to seem ordinary 

Then the brain would tell its host 

   that this not confabulation, but reality

The end goal would be: 

  We would not be haunted by guilt, 

  We would not miss the past, 

  We would tell ourselves we did nothing wrong, 

The brain creates a safer, comfortable new reality. 

But deep deep down, 

Buried underneath all those filters, 

Under all of those layers of confabulations,

Honesty prevails. 

We did have magical moments,

We wrote letters to each other on the same day, 

We both cried underneath under the shower, 

We did love one another. 

Sorry brain,

You have to work harder to protect your hosts. 

How Long Has It Been?

It has been a month since your last letter,

It still tears me inside out,

Knowing it is all I have of you.