The Reason

I’ve been asking why I detached,

Spent lonely nights thinking about the reasons why,

Months of contemplating, 

But I finally did it, why? 

I was happy, 

I was whole,

But I left anyway, why?

Not a single thread of hatred,

Not even a droplet of anger in my cup,

But why did tears come out whenever I looked up? 

Then I realized that all I wanted was,

For you to call it what it really was,

We used a lot of alternatives to express our feelings,

Care, proud, missing, longing, 

And a whole list of other adjectives 

To describe what it really was. 

It was love. 

We can deny it as much as we want,

But why does freedom feel like a burden?

Why does leaving feel like dying? 

And I realized that above all that,

All I wanted was for you to be happy,

I wanted you to be free,

Free from guilt of loving your freedom,

Free from me. 

So there I was, letting you go,

Knowing that sincerity comes with a hefty price,

I’m still paying in instalments,

That I could barely afford,

So be free baby, be happy.