Messed Up

As i breathe in this tobacco,
I see myself from another's eye,
Man why am I so messed up,
Constantly waiting for the surreal,
Like a horse by a dry pond,
Waiting for water to magically spring

These endless yearnings are killing me,
Why was it never this hard before,
What had changed?
There was a time when I've had options,
Happiness came in bulks,
I had the first pick for everything

Is this what growing up means?
Having to wait for the good things,
Call me impatient, I don't care,
I never had to wait this long,
Nor was I ever this lost,
This road is confusing

Life is like a hot, tiring journey,
There isn't any pit stop to rest,
We don't run on fuel,
So there is no excuse for a break,
Every baby is cursed with problems,
Was my curse stronger than others?

As i put off this cigarette,
I came back into my own messed up self,
Trying to think straight,
But all I see is my bed and pillows,
Will resolve my problems tomorrow,
Didn't I say that last night?

Its one of those nights

There was a time when nighttime was beautiful,
The moon smiled and the stars danced,
Clouds were scarce,
Majestic skies above me

The air was just right,
Not too cold nor too warm,
Crickets were my symphony,
Loneliness was fabled dreams

These days dusk is a drag,
The same moon doesn't smile anymore,
The stars are stupid stationary lights,
The sky looks heavy and sad

The air is never right,
Always chilling me to my core,
Crickets' songs are nuisance,
Loneliness is a tireless company

There Will Come A Day

There will come a day,
When you would realize I had been right all along,
You would want to settle down and steer the right way,
Perhaps you would even find a guy like me,
Who is honest enough to tell what is yeay and nay,
For your happiness I shall always pray

There will come a day,
When you'd feel so lonely and cramped,
Everyone you call friend wouldn't give a damn,
You'd be lost as I was and happiness would decay,
Life without trust and honesty is hell,
You face smiles but really, you're an empty shell

There will come a day,
When you'd feel sorry for what you've done,
Sorry for putting pride and selfishness in front,
Viva la vida lonely ranger,
Do know that this parting is forever,
Grieves and tears won't bring back the years

There will come a day,
When I'd regret knowing you,
All the love spilled, and all the time we wasted,
What I'd regret most is the fact that you will change course,
You'll be a better person through and true,
But when that day comes, I'm no longer yours.

I've been nineteen once. Been there, done that.

Secret Lover

The term "secret lovers" is a bullshitt thing.

Have some pride in your partner.

Waja silver WLE 4090 hilang

Ada orang curi kereta aku di McDonalds Drive thru SS15 Subang Jaya
Proton Waja (metallic silver)
WLE 4090

If you spot this car anywhere, do call 999 and extend to SS17 Subang Jaya Police Station.

Ku haus di tengah laut,
Lemas mencari tempat berpaut,
Kirimkan aku kekuatan,
Tetap pedoman di kesesatan

Ku sunyi dalam gembira,
Perit pedih tanggung derita,
Sungguh aku bukan wali,
Yang suci dari hina dan benci

Isi Te_p_t Kos_ng

Hidup ini satu ujian,
Soalannya mudah nian,
Sepotong kata pilihan beribu,
Yang betul cuma satu

Bagi setiap persoalan diri,
Tempat kosong perlu diisi,
Setiap jawapan cerminan kehidupan,
Apa ke kiri atau ke kanan

Bila fikiran mula buntu,
Tidak diteliti isian itu,
Mula terngiang di cuping telinga,
Usah difikir hentamkan saja

Bagi setiap soalan yang salah,
Akan mula berangkai masalah,
Makin lama makin susah,
Padah mengambil jalan mudah

Ada ketika jawapannya jelas,
Tetapi ego dan pendirian di atas,
Sengaja diambil jalan berliku,
Tidak mungkin akhir ketemu

Isi tempat kosong itu,
Satu yang betul dari beribu,
Terus ku selak kamus alam,
Hanya yang satu ku idam-idam

Terma & Syarat

Penentu polisi dunia adalah kau,
Hakim segala bicara adalah kau,
Penentu rasa bahagia juga adalah kau,
Pada kau, segalanya berkisarkan kau

Segala undang-undang engkau cipta,
Demi ketenteraman kau seorang sahaja,
Tiada erti empati juga simpati,
Yang kau pentingkan ego sendiri

Yang bercanggah pendapat kau label musuh,
Ide yang berbeza dipandang keruh,
Berkerut dahi bertutup telinga,
Yang bukan darimu tiada nilainya

Bukan sekutu yang kucari,
Bukan musuh yang aku wakili,
Tetapi terma yang kau tulis kejam,
Dan syarat yang kau beri berbau dendam